time marches on

Thursday as we waited to be seen for a follow-up appointment, a new couple entered the waiting room. I watched the familiar scene as the dad had to do all the talking. They sat in the chairs by the wall and he called the registration desk so she could be seen for an emergency ultrasound. Meanwhile, she wiped away new tears with a soaked tissue. I know those chairs. I know those tears. I hope a few months from now they know the joy of having a new baby.

Another thing I remember about the day we first learned about Calla's problems was that the calendar was a month behind. It was only January 9, so not too out of the ordinary for December to still be up. It was a picture of red and white poinsettias. I liked the picture, but mostly I remember wishing we could go back to December. It was such a good month for us. Things were shaping up well for Matt's business and the holidays were some of the best we'd shared. Howie was at such a fun age and we had a new baby to look forward to.

As the weeks passed and appointments blurred together, the exam rooms got new calendars, all except room 2. Even though we received more bad news and endured several procedures in that room, the picture could always take me back. Having it there was like being able to freeze time- to ignore for a minute what we knew was ahead and think about the happy times not too far past.

Today we went for our last appointment for awhile. Exam room 2 is getting a new calendar. I claimed the poinsettias for my own.